Asparagus Soup

Once again I found myself with a sick girlfriend in need of soup.  This time I had a whole bunch of asparagus and potatoes in the fridge so I stopped by the market on the way home from work for a few complimenting ingredients and got to work.

onion
garlic
1 fennel bulb
3-4 small potatoes
asparagus (about a pound I think)
cream
yogurt
chives

I meant to use chicken stock as my base but discovered I was out after I had already started cooking so I went without. It still worked out just fine.  I like using fennel in these all-veggie soups because it adds an almost meaty heartiness to recipes. I hear it's a common seasoning in making sausage so maybe our taste buds are just salivating to the ring of a bell so to speak.

Saute onions and garlic.  Add fennel and cook about 5 min.  Add potatoes and just enough water to barely cover the potatoes.  Boil until potatoes are tender, then add the asparagus and put the lid on so they get steamed.  After about 3-4 min the asparagus will be tender and you can blend it.   I added a little cream to each batch I put in the blender but I think yogurt would work too if you're looking for the low fat option.  I added some sliced ham on top just to get a little protein into the meal - it was tasty.

Brie Stuffed Meatballs

For my birthday we put a wheel of brie on the grill. It was delicious but since we had just been to Costco and bought a life time supply of almost everything, our friends barely put a dent in any one dish.   The next week I found myself with a whole lot of beef and brie and so I did the only logical thing and rolled it all up into little balls.

Balls:
1 lb ground beef
basil
bread
1/3c buttermilk
garlic

Sauce:
tomato sauce
canned diced tomatoes
basil
onion
garlic
olives

I admit it! I used store bought sauce (as a base).  Sometimes shortcuts are worth it - this one didn't seem too bad. If you decide to follow in my path just be sure to find one without too much sugar in it.  I used Trader Joe's.  I always like to start by caramelizing the onions and then I pretty much just throw everything else in and simmer it.

For the meatballs I started by looking at my America's Test Kitchen cookbook.  It had me starting with some little torn up pieces of bread and buttermilk.  I'm not sure what this does but the final product is tasty.  I put the bread, buttermilk, garlic, and basil in my fancy new food processor and made a lumpy paste. Then, I added the meat and pulsed a few times.  I just rolled the mixture it into balls, pushed a chunk of cheese into the middle of each and fried them up.

If I had to change something I might actually change the cheese.  Brie was good, and lord knows we had enough of it, but I think goat cheese or blue cheese would be really good too.

Wontons, Wontons, and Wontons

My sister and father came to visit and requested a blog worthy meal but I also had to work that day.  So, I made a couple different fillings and sauces the night before and then just filled and fried them when they came over.  Everyone enjoyed them straight out of the skillet.  They were gone before I could finish frying the next batch. 

I made a typical wonton filling with pork, cabbage, carrots and ginger (blue bowl above) but then I got a bit more creative for the other two types.  On the wrappers and ready to be folded and fried are pork, pineapple, and cilantro wontons and in the white bowl is the filling for pork, apple, cherry wontons.  And in the tumbler is a manhatten on the rocks - good wonton making fuel.  The unanimous favorite was the pork, apple, cherry wonton with blue cheese dipping sauce.

Wonton 1
pork
cabbage
carrots
fresh ginger
green onion

Sauce 1
soy sauce
rice vinegar
red chili paste
sesame oil

Wonton 2
pork
apples
dried cherries (diced)

Sauce 2
plain yogurt
mayo
blue cheese

Wonton 3
pork
pineapple
cilantro
green onion

Sauce 3
plain yogurt
fresh lime juice
garlic
cumin

Obviously you want to dice or grate all of the filling ingredients.  Then just put a scoop of filling on a wonton wrapper, wet the edges (water works fine) and pinch the edges closed.  Heat oil to 350-375 in a deep skillet, or deep fryer if you have one, and cook until nice and brown.  I don't have a deep fryer so I use my cast iron skillet which is nice because of its thermal mass, the oil doesn't cool down much when you dip cold stuff in it.  I have also used a cast iron dutch oven in the past which works splendidly as well.

Pot Roast and Caramelized Onion Sandwich

I'm a huge fan of making actual meals out of left overs instead of just heating them back up. The caramelized onions and sauce are easy to make and transform the cold boring leftovers into something even better than the original meal. I suppose one could add melted cheese to this but I don't think it's necessary.

beef
sweet onion
bread
mayo
fresh lemon juice
garlic
fresh thyme

To caramelize onions a little bit faster than normal start the onions in a dry pan and wait to add the butter when they are hot and starting to glisten (about 5 min). I can't remember why this makes them go faster but a chef told me about it once and I remember it making sense. Plus, it works.
For the sauce I start with the minced garlic and some salt and then add the mayo and lemon juice.  Always use fresh lemon juice, store bought stuff will ruin any sauce.  I threw in some thyme because it seems to go well with beef and was in the fridge but you could experiment with other herbs too.

Candied Orange Peel and Toffee

I like candy. So does Pooh.

Candied Orange Peel:
6 oranges
4 1/2 cups of sugar
1 1/2 cups water
chocolate

Peal the oranges and slice them up.  Put the peels in cold water and bring to a boil.  Once boiling, drain them, put in more cold water and bring to a boil again.  Do this 3-4 times to take out some of the bitterness.  Put water and sugar in a pan and bring to a simmer. Add peels and let simmer for about 45 min.   Pull out orange peels and coat in sugar.  Dip or drizzle with chocolate and enjoy!

Toffee:
butter
sugar
chocolate

So, after making the orange peels I had a bunch of melted sugar just sitting there so I added butter and made toffee.  It's a 1:1 ratio of  sugar to butter - just add the right amount of butter and simmer.  You want to simmer it until the temperature reaches 285 degrees and it gets to the color brown you're looking for.  Dump it out on a foil wrapped cooking sheet (with edges) and sprinkle with chocolate chips.  The toffee will melt the chocolate and then you can smooth it out with a rubber spatula for a nice even coat.  Cool, break into pieces, and eat.

Why Just Coffee?

So, the link below will guide you to a humorous website promoting the versatility of a conventional coffee maker: http://www.geekosystem.com/coffee-maker-food/
What caught my attention was the last item, beer. In addition to cooking I am an amateur homebrewer and so I was naturally skeptical. But, after re-reading the instructions a number of times, I have come to the conclusion that it is totally plausible! If anyone tries this please please please let me know how it goes.  It sure would be a lot of work for 8 cups of beer but who knows, could be the best 8 cups ever.  Micro-brew? More like a nano-brew.

Beef, Potatoes, and Gravy

This was a lazy man's version of a recipe from Cooks Illustrated.  I made it as simply as I could so my sick girlfriend could just throw it in the oven a few hours before I got home.

Beef:
3-4 lb chuck roast
1 onion
1 carrot
1 celery stalk
garlic
1 cup red wine
1/2 cup water
1-2 Tbs tomato paste
1 tsp anchovy paste
salt

Put it all in a heavy dutch oven with a lid and bake at 300 for 3-4 hours.  If you have time, salting the beef and letting it sit for about an hour at room temp before adding everything else is supposed to add to the beefy flavor.  The anchovy also enhances the beef flavor.  the recipe said to saute' the onion and celery before adding the beef and liquids to the pot but I didn't and it was still tasty.

Gravy:
beef drippings
flour
balsamic vinegar
red wine

the recipe said to puree the veggies as a method to thicken the gravy but I didn't have a blender so I just used a rue the old fashioned way.  Adding some more red wine and a little bit of vinegar brightens up the flavors in a nice way.

Potatoes:
potatoes
garlic
butter
milk
salt

Boil the potatoes, add everything else and mash it up.  Yum.

The biscuits were great too but I didn't bake them. The recipe will be posted on this awesome baking blog soon: http://www.chipsandsugar.com/

Sick Girlfriend Chicken Noodle Soup

Gents, this soup will make her love you.  If she already loves you, she will love you at least 56 units (metric) more.  Don't forget to mention you made the broth from scratch for a bonus 10 units of love.

homemade broth (see past soup entries)
white wine
6 chicken thighs
noodles
mushrooms
carrots
celery
sweet onion
garlic
thyme
salt pepper
fresh lemon juice

I usually make my stock fresh but I had some in the freezer from another soup and I was in a hurry.  Thighs were on sale so I baked them while I worked on the rest of the soup and then picked the meat off the bones and added it at the end.  To start, saute' the onions and garlic, add mushrooms and then celery.  Then add liquids and carrots.  One could add potatoes or kale as I had planned to but my pot was getting pretty full.  I like to cook the noodles separately and add them at the end. This way they aren't over cooked and my broth isn't all starchy.  Fresh lemon juice right before eating is optional but I really liked it - personal preference.

Seafood Chowder

I debated calling this "six species stew" because I was in temporarily in awe of my carnivorousness having just combined four sea dwelling creatures with two air breathers to create a delicious meal buuuuut, seafood chowder is really a much nicer way of saying all that.  

3 strips of thick bacon

1 onion

3 stalks of celery

chicken broth (homemade is best, it is good to keep some frozen for occasions like this)

white wine

2 carrots

1 large potato

cream 

1lb clams

1/2lb mussels

1/2 lb shrimp

1/2lb small bay scallops

chop the bacon into little bits and cook.  Add onion and cook a while, then add celery. Add wine, broth, and veggies and cook until potatoes are almost done.  Add cream and thicken soup somehow (see below).  Add seafood and cook for just a few minutes before serving.  Whatever you do don't overcook the seafood. The scallops should be added last since they really only need about 120 seconds.  Also, when buying scallops don't get the really white ones, they have been soaked in a preservative. Instead you want the dry packed ones that are a little bit cream colored.  Freshness of the seafood you're using is important so try to buy it fresh the same day you plan to use it.

a note on thickening:

I guess traditional chowder is thickened with "ship biscuit" aka "hardtack" but I tried using my regular standby, cornstarch, with limited success.  I would have liked a thicker soup but the fact that it didn't thicken much didn't impact my enjoyment all that much. Good luck thickening, if you find a great method please comment and let me know.

Simple Chicken Salad Sandwich

cooked chicken (great way to used left overs)

mayo

celery

apple

tarragon

fresh lemon juice

Mix it all up and put it on some tasty sourdough. 

Fried Calamari

I was at the Fisherman's Terminal today buying seafood for a clam chowder that has turned into an everything chowder (new england style) and I saw squid! Their little disembodied-tentacle-bunches stared up at me and cried, "Eat us, eat us". How could I not?  This was my first time making calamari and as it turns out, calamari is super quick and simple.  

Calamari:

squid

flour

5 spice

cayenne powder

salt

oil

Heat up canola oil to about 350F in a heavy pan - the heavier the pan, the less the heat will drop when you add the squid.  Just cut up the squid, coat in the flour mixture (add other seasonings if you feel like it) and fry. I tried dipping the calamari in the flour, then in egg and then in the flour again to get a thicker breading and it worked but the squid got lost in the breading and it was tough to get the dough crispy all the way through without over cooking the squid. One dip in the flour was enough. 

Dip:

mayo

garlic

salt

hot sauce

fresh lemon juice

Mix garlic with a pinch of salt and then add everything else.

Pulled Pork, Homemade Pickles & Aioli

I need to fire Lars my photographer for this one. This sandwich is way tastier than it looks.  Pork shoulders were on sale so I threw one in a crock pot for a day and whipped up some refrigerator pickles and aioli. 

Pork:

1 pork shoulder (I think mine was around 4lbs)

apple cider vinegar

white wine

garlic

Cook in crock pot until meat is tender and shreddable (figure 6-8 hours)

I saved the drippings and plan to make a tangy sauce for another pork sandwich. Will post recipe when done.

Pickles:

carrots

cucumber

red onion

apple cider vinegar

water

sugar

salt

I used the slicing side of my box grater to slice the carrots and cucumber really thin really fast.  People living in this decade can use their food processors.  Start with about two table spoons of sugar per cup of water.  Mix half sugar water and half vinegar and adjust from there.  If you start these at the same time as the meat you'll  be in good shape and they're even better the next day.  I like to add fresh dill when I don't forget to buy it. 

Aioli:

mayo

garlic

thyme

rosemary

sage

salt

apple cider vinegar

Ok, so I took the shortcut and used mayo but that's because I'm lazy.  The apple cider vinegar was supposed to be lemon juice but that's because I forgot to buy lemons. Despite all of this, this recipe worked out well for this sandwich but you could mix pretty much any tasty flavors with mayo and have a decent sauce.  I like to start by mushing the garlic and salt together before adding the other stuff.  Mixing it with salt first seems to take the harsh edge off the garlic so you can taste more of the garlic flavor.  

Sweet Potato Black Bean Chicken Soup

Broth:
2 lbs chicken with bones
3 carrots with tops
4 stalks celery
1 onion
6 garlic cloves
thyme

Homemade broth is really easy and totally worth it if you happen to be hanging out at home for a couple hours anyway.  Basically keep everything covered in water and boil for about 3 hours or until you're too impatient to wait any longer.  Take the chicken out after about 45 min. so you don't boil it into mush.  I pull the chicken off the bone as soon as its cool enough and then throw the bones back in.

Then I make broth I like to use a reusable mesh grain bag that i bought for homebrewing to put the veggies in. This eliminates trying to strain the steaming hot broth later.   Any homebrew shop will stock these and they're only about $10.

Soup:
1 onion
4-5 cups broth
1 medium sweet potato
1 can diced tomatoes
3 big scoops of chunky peanut butter
pulled chicken (from broth)
cooked black beans
chili garlic sauce
salt
pineapple (optional)

Instructions: 
saute onion in butter
add everything else and simmer to combine flavors
stir in pineapple before serving

Welcome

Welcome to Olives & Orgasms.  I love olives. A lot. Not the way kids love PB&J or the way I love a good beer and the end of a long day.  I really love olives.  "Why don't you marry them" one might ask.  Well, maybe I will... and then I'll eat them.

This is not a blog about the use of food in various sex acts or about my love of olives and yes, I love orgasms too.  What this blog is about is food.  More specifically, food that I make, eat, and hopefully enjoy.  I've never been a good recipe follower which curses me in all of my baking endeavours, but it's what makes the less precise art of cooking fun for me.  I often begin with many recipes and through all of the pouring, dumping, pinching, and dashing I end up with something uniquely mine.  I will attempt to offer guidance on the amounts of the ingredients I use but in the end, these are just starting points to be taken with a grain of salt...or a teaspoon depending on your tastes.